What Does It Feel Like To Be a Man?

Hafiz was asked: what does it feel like to be a man? His answer:


“My dear,
I am not so sure.”

Then she said,
“Well, aren’t you a man?”

And this time I replied,
“I view gender
As a beautiful animal
That people often take for a walk on a leash
And might try to enter in some odd contest
To try to win prizes.

“My dear,
A better question for Hafiz
Would have been,

“How does it feel to be a heart?”

For all I know is Love,
And I find my heart Infinite
And Everywhere!

I’m afraid I differ from the great poet. I know what it feels like to be a man, and it is this:

I don’t know how to express myself emotionally — and I mean truly express myself —without feeling like I’m going to lose absolutely everything as a result.

Continue reading “What Does It Feel Like To Be a Man?”

I Will Make Him a Helper: Homosexuality and Erotic Union

As I’ve told my story of failure and wounding within a commitment to lifelong celibacy – and how I have eventually walked away from it – the most common response from conservative Christians has been withering. The vast majority of them who have responded on social media and the blogosphere have been singing variations of, “so what you are saying is that you cannot live without sex.” When they hear me say that Side B (the traditional view of gay marriage) crushed me, they assume that’s because I can only conceive of intimacy as a sexual act, that I have an idolatrous view of romance, and that I see sex and romance as the most fulfilling experience on earth. They also assume that I have a misplaced understanding of community and friendship.

Continue reading “I Will Make Him a Helper: Homosexuality and Erotic Union”